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'Hold my purse'." ~ Unknown"Marriage is give and take.You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway." ~ Anonymous"The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness and kindness, can be trained to do most things." ~ Jilly Cooper"The quickest way to a man's heart is through his chest." ~ Roseanne Barr"Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you." ~ Helen Rowland"There is a vast difference between the savage and the civilized man, but it is never apparent to their wives until after breakfast." ~ Helen Rowland"Never trust a husband too far or a bachelor too near." ~ Helen Rowland"A man falls in love through his eyes, a woman through her ears." ~ Woodrow Wyatt"A man is already halfway in love with any woman who listens to him." ~ Brendan Francis"A man in love is like a clipped coupon - it's time to cash in." ~ Mae West"A man in love is incomplete until he is married.

You'll find the occasional king, but most are jacks." ~ Laura Swenson According to a popular book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, there are a few instances when men and women have divided opinions about many things.

Just don’t be a creep and invite us to kick you in the shins. She will strap on those running shoes and will be sprinting by your side. So she brings in the fat = fit equation in her life by making up for all the hogging in the workout department. Plus, since she doesn’t starve herself either, she can hold the booze too! Noticed the number of fleshrockets wanting to drill what you got? Plus, most of us have a rib-cracking sense of humor – so we are sure splitting those flies wide open – one way or the other. Cuddly-snuggly There’s a reason baby got back got so famous.

She won’t even say no to juice cleanses once a week. You see more cushin’ for the pushin’ is always welcome.

Anything hilarious, be it a funny scene, incident or even a quote, always brings sunshine to a gloomy day.

Funny quotes about anything can help keep your life on a high note.

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